it's incredible how powerful the mind is, how it must cope with any given situation. i have been in bed for a week, in one room, people coming in and going out. My brother and Jojo providing a continuous flow of Life Force (food) keeping me alive and healthy, the doctors bringing a continuous delivery of bad news, the nurses doing the best of what they can with bellow the par tools, experience and information, cleaners who come in at the worst time you can imagine, make the room sting of toxic disinfectants, and porters who bang you against every wall in the hospital as they wheel you to different scanning machines. I'm telling you, it's great fun. for sure it beats going from pool to pool, treatment to treatment, in the beautiful Florida sunshine at Hippocrates.
So Mr Dehghani you are paralised for life, chest down and IF you survive the cancer, you will live life in a wheelchair. OK, i get the message, but when can i start looking at rehabilitation centers and give myself the best rehabilitation start, i need to limit every millimeter of damage to my spine and potential future movements, i need to see a specialist urgently. this is a cancer hospital and you guys don't know much about spinal rehabilitation. i was recommended Stoke Mandveille and The Wellington Centre. can we please get in touch with them and ask for some advice as what my range of movements should be and what to avoid? you can't just forget about my legs, i can't just forget about them, if miracles happen, i want it to happen to me, i want to protect myself. They were all looking at me as if i had lost my mind!
Their response was we need to start you on this new Chemotherapy and stop the tumor from growing further. I said the last MRI scan did not show extensive growth. Can we do a CT scan, see the extend of disease growth and take a decision on the chemo then. A CT scan was organised for Tuesday.
I spent all day Monday calling the different rehabilitation centers myself, emailing them URGENT, URGENT, URGENT etc. Monday night, 8 pm! a Dr Fidel Derry from Stoke Mandveille called me. i was very touched he had taken the time to do this. he asked me to tell him my story from the beginning which i did. He knew the neurosurgeon who had given the disability verdict on my leg and but did not get involved in his verdict.
He said i hope you don't mind me being frank with you. we/most rehabilitation centers work with post accident injuries and rarely with spinal cord rehabilitation caused by chronic diseases. we feel that unless there is a high chance of recovery, ie total remission from the tumor, then it is not in the best interest of the patient or the hospital to spend 3 to 4 months rehabilitating you. they could be spending this time with their friends and family and enjoy the last few months of their lives! Basically they would not accept me as a patient, unless my oncologist was convinced that i have good survival chance of more than a year so on. these were harsh words, once again, ruling out all possibilities and killing hope. But for some very strange reason, the way he explained his opinion, i saw a sense in what he was saying, not that i agreed with it. i could see how it would be true for some people. he then went on to explain that after rehabilitation people live a normal independent lives, they can drive, live on their own, they might not be able to do DIY or might need help with gardening, but life can be pretty much normal depending on their age and their will. he made me feel good about the future, much better about my situation. amazing what an experience voice does. i started thinking of electric wheelchairs, all disability allowances, parking, never queuing, there are so many benefits. i will just cream it : )
Tuesday morning i needed bathroom, i had to be lifted out of my bed by a hoist and put into a portable loo, the funniest thing you can imagine. as i was hanging up in the air, Jojo and i were looking at each other laughing. what has life come to! so glad she was there to help me. i did my enema and wheatgrass implant. i felt so good after awards. i totally cleared my digestive system. when you're stuck in a bed, it all gets stuck in you, so important you clear it so new food and energy can follow through. now they normally give u drugs or depositories, don't fancy those chemicals going in. natural way al the way.
CT Scan. 30 minutes later.... Doctors come in groups.
Your disease is out of control. The latest CT Scan, contrary to the MRI scan which had shown no tumor growth on the spine, shows tumor spread to your liver, right chest and your previous tumor in your back chest wall has doubled in size. aggressive and fast growing. we need urgent action.
We are 50% confident the chemo will work and we want to start tomorrow. we need to organise your PICC line for tomorrow, i asked for 30 minutes to confirm my decision.
So this is what i did
My Situation:
Enemy, an extremely fast tumor growing in me, the ferrari of all tumors.
Friend, My Diet, Going to Hippocrates saved my life, but takes time, patience, it's a life change program
Dodgy guy i know, he doesn't have a good reputation, he is new boy on the block and he is being questioned. he has support from some people and not others, he is quick and could give a hand to the diet buying him some time.
i think i need to get my friend and the dodgy guy work together and kick the shit of the Enemy.
Right now, it is also very important that i have my full Oncologists support. he has pulled some major strings with doctors and surgeons, and i need to focus on the bigger picture.
chemo attack, food heal, together they kick ass. Professor and I work together and get me into a rehab.
i had my PICC line put in this morning. it's a thin tube pushed through one of your veins from your elbow to your heart, strange feeling. My room became an operating theatre in seconds. they put green sheets on everything, head to toe in surgeon outfit etc. anyway, small pinch and 20 minutes, it's in. thanks god for that. i was sweating, pinching my fingers banging my phone against my head, anything to divert the attention. i had to twist my neck and look down to avoid the line going towards the brain! that didn't happen. She was very sweet, friendly and fun.
At 6pm they brought it.
i'm lying on my bed with a futuristic looking baby milk bottle! it's my companion for the next 24 hrs.
we are meditating together with my toxic bottle of chemo and accepting him into the family. i'm warning him not to be too harsh, and respect what i have been doing for the lest 4 weeks.
we are going to work as a team, we have the same objective.
by embrassing a foreign object or even a chemical, we can united them and get the most of out them.
So this is what i'm doing.
I contacted a beautiful lady called Nadia who has been working with male and female breast cancer patients for over 20 year. She works at the Heaven Clinic in London Fullham. She had it herself and healed herself totally naturally. She was at Hippocrates a few years ago, we shared our experience and we both felt in heaven for short period of time, she brought back so many inspirational stories, hope and miracles
Positivity is so important. i'm getting more and more fired up by the day, feels the hospital brings you down soon as you arrive and you got to bounce back. i'm meeting a highly recommended acupuncturist tomorrow, look into wheelchairs, you can spend more money on a car than a wheelchair! couple hand excercise tools, get the blood going. come on let the journey begin. i wana get out of this bed.
we have been doing my Hippocrates diet 100% exact since i arrived. i wonder how many people have managed to be as disciplined as we. Unquestionably we have a good team, i'm the guide, Moh is everything, shopper, delivery, juicing, makes salads. Jojo is juicing, salads and gourmet shopping and hygiene. So grateful, so please everyone a major sending of love, strength and energy to Moh and Jojo.
no need to say how wonderful you all are supporting me in this tough journey. i would love to have a one to one replies with everyone one day, meet the people i don't know, i have so much more to learn from your experience. can't wait.
but for tonight i'm going to make friends with my Dodgy friend. i don't know too much about him, enough he could be dangerous, but he could have a another side.
i'm lying on my bed with a futuristic looking baby milk bottle! it's my companion for the next 24 hrs.
we're going to have some grown up chats about this cancer guy, who does he think he is. let's kick his ass.
by the morning, we will be working as a unit.
all my love and a new life
life force
Wednesday, 30 April 2008
Saturday, 26 April 2008
What a day? What a week?
Very difficult to think of a tittle for this post. it's amazing what a difference a week or a day can make!
Is it further set back or is it my path in life?
Unfortunately things have got a lot worst since my last post.
From Sunday onwards i have been loosing more and more strength in my feet and legs to the point where on Tuesday i could barely move them.
Tuesday morning i decided it was time to come home and get a scan, see what is going on. Hippocrates is a healing clinic and they do not do diagnosis, there are no scanners and testing equipments.
In the back of my mind i was convinced it was not the cancer growing as i 100% believe in this diet and life style program. it all makes sense. but something had to be going on in my body, my condition was getting worst by the hour.
i saw the doctors at Hippocrates on Tuesday, they agreed with my decision, i changed my flight to Wednesday evening, the next available flight and started getting ready to come home.
Wednesday morning i woke up once again weaker, but managed to get myself onto my wheelchair, into the taxi and the airport.
overall it was a comfortable journey. i was still positive all the way. strange going through the airport, everyone with cups of Starbucks in the their hands, all the shops serving fast food, the smell absolutely delicious and so tempting. i boarded the plane but as time went by i started to become worried as to what was happening. doesn't matter how much you try and control your mind, it still runs away with thoughts and emotions fly high. i could not do my meditation as i couldn't get my mind under control, i just couldn't concentrate. i decided to take a couple of sleeping pills and sleep my way back, and i did.
Moh picked me up from the airport and we came straight to the hospital. i had organised everything before getting here so they were expecting me. obviously the general understanding amongst the doctors was that the tumor had grown during this time as i was not having chemo therapy causing further damage to my spine etc. i had an MRI scan at 4 pm on Thursday. they scanned the whole spine and neck, but the tumor had not grown. the scan was identical to my last scan. at least that's what they said. GREAT news.
but what could it be? a nerve infection, but that would mean i have contracted another disease, that would be highly unlikely. i have been getting healthier, boosting my immune system and so on. but i suppose i was still hoping for another reason than the cancer.
On Friday morning the doctors think the problem might be coming from higher up, perhaps a tumor in the brain!!! oops, that really got me going now. mind racing, all sorts of possibilities coming to my head. moments of real darkness, worry but at the same time confusion and i feel very emotional. i was having all sorts of thoughts in the MRI scanner. my head was inside a barred cage, the machine making loud tapping noises, i was listening to classical music on the headphones and thinking about a one way ticket to the an inevitable destination. But, and there was a big BUT, this all doesn't make sense. the first scan is not showing growth, how could there be a tumor in the brain and grown so quickly as to affect my strength over night. also i don't have any side affects such a blurred vision or headaches... i suddenly realized that just being in this environment i was starting to have negative thoughts, so easily distracted, my positivity, hope and belief was fading away, i was going backwards. come on Reza get yourself together.
the scan took 30 minutes, and the results came out within 15 minutes, all clear. a beautiful glowing brain : ) at least i definitely know i have a brain!
So what does it mean now?
20 minutes later, a neurologist consultant arrived.
he examined me and straight away ruled out any possibility of viral infection. he reviewed the scans and believed that there was further pressure on the spinal cord causing spinal cord compression or tumor growth around a blood vessel feeding the spinal cord. he prescribed IV steroids to protect my spine overnight and see if it helps with the pressure. this morning i felt slightly energetic, but that was the high dosage of steroids!
next step was to see a Neurologist surgeon to see if he can operate to relieve the pressure on the spinal cord to save my legs.
Mr Cassie arrived at 5 today, a very nice chap, in his 50s. straight to the point, he went through my symptoms, examined me, and without hesitation told me there was nothing he could do. it would be a big operation, but fairly straight forward, will take 2hrs, however he doesn't feel it would benefit me. i will risk further infection, pain, weakness and my body will have to deal with the trauma of an operation. basically i have lost my legs. no chance of recovery!!! over the next few weeks all feelings will go including pins and needles, i will be like a vegetable from chest down.
His words were piercing through my brain. every word was like a sharp bullet entering my skull, this is the end, just lie there and wait till you're totally crippled, no way back, no hope, no chance, no miracles, nothing he can do and he is very experienced. any question we asked, the answer was no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no....
my mind was rushing, i was trying to visualize the life ahead of me, what life? this is not a life, just do the operation, i need to try anything, i don't want this ending, anything but this. i can't just sit here and wait till i disintegrate. this is not how it's suppose to end, no way. tears starting to poor out. Moh and Jojo were in the room with me. Dr apologizes and leaves the room.
silence, tears, my body is shaking, not sure what it is? anger, fear, sadness, outrage, what am i thinking, what should i be thinking, come on Reza, get yourself together, stop and think. but tears just took over and i just let them out.
the tears stopped and i had a clear head for a few seconds.
positivity came rushing back into my head. so many dreams wiped out of my life, but so many more came rushing in. i can make a life of this, there are 1000's of people out there successful, living healthy rich lives. i just need to find my way. then the miracles, the testimonials of the people i had met and read about at Hippocrates start rushing back, power of the mind, positive thinking. i suddenly remembered i was exactly in the same position 6 weeks ago when they told me it was all over. i managed to walk again lift my spirit, be enlightened, and be so happy.
i'm looking at it this way, what are my options? sit here and be sad, cry about it, or believe in myself and get on with life. i can make a good like. i have to play my hand, whatever my cards. it's going to be tough, so tough, the sooner i come to terms with it, the further ahead i will be.
so i'm as positive as one can be under the circumstances.
i was very annoyed he didn't give me any advice on how to protect my spinal cord from further damage and what sort routine, exercise, massage, movement or activity to adopt straight away to preserve the rest of my spine and increase my strength. this demonstrates their further narrow point of view on healing and hope. so now i am on case of finding a top rehabilitation consultant and give myself every chance to heal myself.
i am continuing with my diet and lifestyle change. some of you may say that the tumor is growing and the diet is not working. the diet takes time, it could be the tumor was still feeding on left over sugar in my body, it's takes time to clean the body, maybe the tumor had grown just a few millimeters and that was enough. anyway, that's what the doctors are saying.i have asked for CT scan this week to see if there is tumor growth anywhere else in my body, and unless there is clear evidence the tumor is growing, i am not going back to chemotherapy. i hope to get home as soon as possible to start my new life.
i'm not sad, i'm not asking why? why me? how this could be happening? i'm not backtracking to see if things could have been different, i don't see any point in this. the best thing i can do is to concentrate on the future, have hope, be positive. as Dr Brian said, 2 years to get rid of the cancer and 7 years to rebuild my body. i needed to learn patient, here comes my lesson. maybe i start my book, start studying, start a new business, so many things to do.
i will be continuing this blog, i love hearing from everyone, it helps me immensely, specially at times when i don't have time to call people, it's great reading your thoughts.
i wish more people would write. i think they enjoy reading the blog and everyone's comments, but don't take those few extra minutes to write something. it can be anything, doesn't need to be intellectual. could be about the weather or your day. just know that those few words makes Reza smile.
i've been telling most of the nurses here about my diet. Sarah makes my wheatgrass juice in the mornings for me. it's amazing how little everyone knows about nutrition and diets.
i'm starting to get emails from various people at Hippocrates. such wonderful people, and to hear how it has changed everyone's life in such a positive direction, it inspires me further that miracles are there waiting for us, we need to move towards them.
what a day, what a week, let's see what kind of life it will be.
love and positive energy
to life force
Reza
Is it further set back or is it my path in life?
Unfortunately things have got a lot worst since my last post.
From Sunday onwards i have been loosing more and more strength in my feet and legs to the point where on Tuesday i could barely move them.
Tuesday morning i decided it was time to come home and get a scan, see what is going on. Hippocrates is a healing clinic and they do not do diagnosis, there are no scanners and testing equipments.
In the back of my mind i was convinced it was not the cancer growing as i 100% believe in this diet and life style program. it all makes sense. but something had to be going on in my body, my condition was getting worst by the hour.
i saw the doctors at Hippocrates on Tuesday, they agreed with my decision, i changed my flight to Wednesday evening, the next available flight and started getting ready to come home.
Wednesday morning i woke up once again weaker, but managed to get myself onto my wheelchair, into the taxi and the airport.
overall it was a comfortable journey. i was still positive all the way. strange going through the airport, everyone with cups of Starbucks in the their hands, all the shops serving fast food, the smell absolutely delicious and so tempting. i boarded the plane but as time went by i started to become worried as to what was happening. doesn't matter how much you try and control your mind, it still runs away with thoughts and emotions fly high. i could not do my meditation as i couldn't get my mind under control, i just couldn't concentrate. i decided to take a couple of sleeping pills and sleep my way back, and i did.
Moh picked me up from the airport and we came straight to the hospital. i had organised everything before getting here so they were expecting me. obviously the general understanding amongst the doctors was that the tumor had grown during this time as i was not having chemo therapy causing further damage to my spine etc. i had an MRI scan at 4 pm on Thursday. they scanned the whole spine and neck, but the tumor had not grown. the scan was identical to my last scan. at least that's what they said. GREAT news.
but what could it be? a nerve infection, but that would mean i have contracted another disease, that would be highly unlikely. i have been getting healthier, boosting my immune system and so on. but i suppose i was still hoping for another reason than the cancer.
On Friday morning the doctors think the problem might be coming from higher up, perhaps a tumor in the brain!!! oops, that really got me going now. mind racing, all sorts of possibilities coming to my head. moments of real darkness, worry but at the same time confusion and i feel very emotional. i was having all sorts of thoughts in the MRI scanner. my head was inside a barred cage, the machine making loud tapping noises, i was listening to classical music on the headphones and thinking about a one way ticket to the an inevitable destination. But, and there was a big BUT, this all doesn't make sense. the first scan is not showing growth, how could there be a tumor in the brain and grown so quickly as to affect my strength over night. also i don't have any side affects such a blurred vision or headaches... i suddenly realized that just being in this environment i was starting to have negative thoughts, so easily distracted, my positivity, hope and belief was fading away, i was going backwards. come on Reza get yourself together.
the scan took 30 minutes, and the results came out within 15 minutes, all clear. a beautiful glowing brain : ) at least i definitely know i have a brain!
So what does it mean now?
20 minutes later, a neurologist consultant arrived.
he examined me and straight away ruled out any possibility of viral infection. he reviewed the scans and believed that there was further pressure on the spinal cord causing spinal cord compression or tumor growth around a blood vessel feeding the spinal cord. he prescribed IV steroids to protect my spine overnight and see if it helps with the pressure. this morning i felt slightly energetic, but that was the high dosage of steroids!
next step was to see a Neurologist surgeon to see if he can operate to relieve the pressure on the spinal cord to save my legs.
Mr Cassie arrived at 5 today, a very nice chap, in his 50s. straight to the point, he went through my symptoms, examined me, and without hesitation told me there was nothing he could do. it would be a big operation, but fairly straight forward, will take 2hrs, however he doesn't feel it would benefit me. i will risk further infection, pain, weakness and my body will have to deal with the trauma of an operation. basically i have lost my legs. no chance of recovery!!! over the next few weeks all feelings will go including pins and needles, i will be like a vegetable from chest down.
His words were piercing through my brain. every word was like a sharp bullet entering my skull, this is the end, just lie there and wait till you're totally crippled, no way back, no hope, no chance, no miracles, nothing he can do and he is very experienced. any question we asked, the answer was no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no....
my mind was rushing, i was trying to visualize the life ahead of me, what life? this is not a life, just do the operation, i need to try anything, i don't want this ending, anything but this. i can't just sit here and wait till i disintegrate. this is not how it's suppose to end, no way. tears starting to poor out. Moh and Jojo were in the room with me. Dr apologizes and leaves the room.
silence, tears, my body is shaking, not sure what it is? anger, fear, sadness, outrage, what am i thinking, what should i be thinking, come on Reza, get yourself together, stop and think. but tears just took over and i just let them out.
the tears stopped and i had a clear head for a few seconds.
positivity came rushing back into my head. so many dreams wiped out of my life, but so many more came rushing in. i can make a life of this, there are 1000's of people out there successful, living healthy rich lives. i just need to find my way. then the miracles, the testimonials of the people i had met and read about at Hippocrates start rushing back, power of the mind, positive thinking. i suddenly remembered i was exactly in the same position 6 weeks ago when they told me it was all over. i managed to walk again lift my spirit, be enlightened, and be so happy.
i'm looking at it this way, what are my options? sit here and be sad, cry about it, or believe in myself and get on with life. i can make a good like. i have to play my hand, whatever my cards. it's going to be tough, so tough, the sooner i come to terms with it, the further ahead i will be.
so i'm as positive as one can be under the circumstances.
i was very annoyed he didn't give me any advice on how to protect my spinal cord from further damage and what sort routine, exercise, massage, movement or activity to adopt straight away to preserve the rest of my spine and increase my strength. this demonstrates their further narrow point of view on healing and hope. so now i am on case of finding a top rehabilitation consultant and give myself every chance to heal myself.
i am continuing with my diet and lifestyle change. some of you may say that the tumor is growing and the diet is not working. the diet takes time, it could be the tumor was still feeding on left over sugar in my body, it's takes time to clean the body, maybe the tumor had grown just a few millimeters and that was enough. anyway, that's what the doctors are saying.i have asked for CT scan this week to see if there is tumor growth anywhere else in my body, and unless there is clear evidence the tumor is growing, i am not going back to chemotherapy. i hope to get home as soon as possible to start my new life.
i'm not sad, i'm not asking why? why me? how this could be happening? i'm not backtracking to see if things could have been different, i don't see any point in this. the best thing i can do is to concentrate on the future, have hope, be positive. as Dr Brian said, 2 years to get rid of the cancer and 7 years to rebuild my body. i needed to learn patient, here comes my lesson. maybe i start my book, start studying, start a new business, so many things to do.
i will be continuing this blog, i love hearing from everyone, it helps me immensely, specially at times when i don't have time to call people, it's great reading your thoughts.
i wish more people would write. i think they enjoy reading the blog and everyone's comments, but don't take those few extra minutes to write something. it can be anything, doesn't need to be intellectual. could be about the weather or your day. just know that those few words makes Reza smile.
i've been telling most of the nurses here about my diet. Sarah makes my wheatgrass juice in the mornings for me. it's amazing how little everyone knows about nutrition and diets.
i'm starting to get emails from various people at Hippocrates. such wonderful people, and to hear how it has changed everyone's life in such a positive direction, it inspires me further that miracles are there waiting for us, we need to move towards them.
what a day, what a week, let's see what kind of life it will be.
love and positive energy
to life force
Reza
Monday, 21 April 2008
A Little Set Back
Funny how i almost predicted i needed to rest!!!
after the writing my last post on Sat night, i had a good night sleep, but woke up in the morning and i could not feel my LEGS!
at first i thought i was dreaming. i sort of stayed in bed for a little bit longer thinking the feeling will come back, i just haven't woken up yet. half an hour later, nothing, i can't move my feet, either of them. i tried to do my meditation but couldn't get into it. i felt a dehydrated, so tried to get up to drink some water, it was very difficult getting up. i was in the room on my won, it was scary.
it took me a couple of hours to get myself together, i drank some water and took my pain killers and sat upright on my bed searching for reasons as to why this was happening. it was a very dark moment, i had tears on my eyes, i just couldn't believe it. i could not even stand on my legs to go to the toilet. But i was walking a few days ago, i had been walking with 1 crutch most of the week, i've been doing my exercises. if i was overdoing it, i would just be a little tired, i wouldn't loose all feelings, go back to point ZERO! what was happening?
all i could think of was to call Vincent, the guy that gave me the massage and helped me walk again. so i called him and he was very calm on the phone. he said to go in and have a massage, it's probably a nerve that has come out of place and this set backs happen often, almost to everyone. 1 step back, 2 steps forward. he was very reassuring and it helped.
i got myself together and Dell picked me up and took me in. it was very hard, i never thought i could make it out of bed.
i went to see Frank, the robot fingers. he had one look at me and said my hip/pelvis was totally twisted. my abs are not strong enough to hold my pelvis in place and it was normal. he did his thing and that got a few muscles moving.
i was in no pain, just no movement, i try to move my feet, my feet don't move. so frustrating.
i came out of Frank's treatment room feeling better, more confident it was temporary set back.
Suddenly Vincent appeared. on his day off, he had decided to come and see me, and make sure i was OK. i was so touched, so pleased to see him, but i felt bad he had spent his sunday driving up (in US everywhere is miles away) to see me. he took me to a quiet corner and did some more work on my legs, back and neck, we had dinner together and he took me home. what beautiful soul. as he left my place, i lied in my bed and fell asleep with the light on. i kept the light on all night, didn't want to be in the dark. i woke up a few times in the middle of the night, tried moving my legs, but no feeling at all. so disappointing, so dark and depressing. i hadn't had this feeling since the day i was told my cancer was all over my back, and chest. for the first time, that feeling of despair was coming back. i went back to sleep and hoped it would get better by the morning.
i had blood test this morning, and i really wanted to go so that i could see the results. this was one appointment i could not miss. i got up at 6 and started to somehow stretch y body and get some blood circulation going on. so hard, i just could see how i could make it out of the bed. i was convinced for a about 20 minutes that i would be bedridden for a couple of days at least. NIGHTMARE.
It was 8 and Dell was knocking on the door. how do i let him in? i can't get up. i don't know how, but i somehow managed to get up and drag myself to door, let him in, and from then he helped me on. he got my WHEELCHAIR for me. yes back in the wheelchair. everyone was coming over all day and encouraging me that it was a small set back, and they are right. i also heard how it happens to so many people, very lucky i'm staying a 4th week, and i have good support here.
i started talking to various staff straight away to understand why this had happened. the reason why i lost the feeling in my legs was because my spine was compressed by the tumor pressing on it. so this was happening again. i'm very confident it's not the tumor growing back, it would not happen over night. it would happen over a few days like it did before. also with this diet, i'm confident the tumor is stopped dead in its tracks. i feel much better overall. so what is pressing against my spinal cord! the only thing i could think of is i had too much nut ice cream (3 servings, should only have 1) on Sat night followed by cooked (i didn't know!!!!) tortilla wraps. they are both very difficult to digest and produce a lot of gas in the stomach if you are not strong to handle them. i felt my stomach and it was very hard. i wheeled myself to the colonic room as quick as i could, and asked the clonic lady what she thought, she touched my stomach and oh boy, she was amazed. very lucky for me, the lady whose appointment was at 9, gave me her place and i went in for a clonic. i had enough gas coming out of me to power Florida for a day. i came out feeling much better, still no feeling in my legs but a lot more relaxed and upper body strength. i have another clonic tomorrow with abdominal massage before hand, i'm hoping that this will make even a bigger improvement. unfortunately i have to go through the process of rebuilding my nerves and muscles again, but that's a small worry.
i have learnt another big lesson, how sensitive our body is in recovery mode. it requires patience and taking it slow. the 2 attributes i miss dearly in life. it has also taught me not to loose faith, believe in what you are doing even when you're having a set back. we can't help having negative thoughts, i think that is almost impossible, but we must stay positive. don't be flaky.
so i fasted on juice today and blended my food so i would ease my digestion. the same tomorrow and Wednesday. i'm going to do Frank's exercise routine every morning, lunch time and evening to get my abs strong and take it slow.
i'm writing this sitting in my wheelchair, i'm just as positive as i was on Sat, a little unhappy as i've lost some of my independence and freedom, but i'm on the right track and i'm sure i will make bigger recovery this time round. i'm going to take my time and be more careful.
i enjoyed reading everyone's comments. you don't know how happy it makes me when i get new comments.
i would love to reply to everyone, but i need to time to do my things, i will get back to everyone individually when i have the time. but please keep the comments coming. i love hearing from new people and people i don't know who have discovered the blog through friends. it's very inspiring for me to know people are enjoying the blog.
all my love
to life force and positive attitude
reza
after the writing my last post on Sat night, i had a good night sleep, but woke up in the morning and i could not feel my LEGS!
at first i thought i was dreaming. i sort of stayed in bed for a little bit longer thinking the feeling will come back, i just haven't woken up yet. half an hour later, nothing, i can't move my feet, either of them. i tried to do my meditation but couldn't get into it. i felt a dehydrated, so tried to get up to drink some water, it was very difficult getting up. i was in the room on my won, it was scary.
it took me a couple of hours to get myself together, i drank some water and took my pain killers and sat upright on my bed searching for reasons as to why this was happening. it was a very dark moment, i had tears on my eyes, i just couldn't believe it. i could not even stand on my legs to go to the toilet. But i was walking a few days ago, i had been walking with 1 crutch most of the week, i've been doing my exercises. if i was overdoing it, i would just be a little tired, i wouldn't loose all feelings, go back to point ZERO! what was happening?
all i could think of was to call Vincent, the guy that gave me the massage and helped me walk again. so i called him and he was very calm on the phone. he said to go in and have a massage, it's probably a nerve that has come out of place and this set backs happen often, almost to everyone. 1 step back, 2 steps forward. he was very reassuring and it helped.
i got myself together and Dell picked me up and took me in. it was very hard, i never thought i could make it out of bed.
i went to see Frank, the robot fingers. he had one look at me and said my hip/pelvis was totally twisted. my abs are not strong enough to hold my pelvis in place and it was normal. he did his thing and that got a few muscles moving.
i was in no pain, just no movement, i try to move my feet, my feet don't move. so frustrating.
i came out of Frank's treatment room feeling better, more confident it was temporary set back.
Suddenly Vincent appeared. on his day off, he had decided to come and see me, and make sure i was OK. i was so touched, so pleased to see him, but i felt bad he had spent his sunday driving up (in US everywhere is miles away) to see me. he took me to a quiet corner and did some more work on my legs, back and neck, we had dinner together and he took me home. what beautiful soul. as he left my place, i lied in my bed and fell asleep with the light on. i kept the light on all night, didn't want to be in the dark. i woke up a few times in the middle of the night, tried moving my legs, but no feeling at all. so disappointing, so dark and depressing. i hadn't had this feeling since the day i was told my cancer was all over my back, and chest. for the first time, that feeling of despair was coming back. i went back to sleep and hoped it would get better by the morning.
i had blood test this morning, and i really wanted to go so that i could see the results. this was one appointment i could not miss. i got up at 6 and started to somehow stretch y body and get some blood circulation going on. so hard, i just could see how i could make it out of the bed. i was convinced for a about 20 minutes that i would be bedridden for a couple of days at least. NIGHTMARE.
It was 8 and Dell was knocking on the door. how do i let him in? i can't get up. i don't know how, but i somehow managed to get up and drag myself to door, let him in, and from then he helped me on. he got my WHEELCHAIR for me. yes back in the wheelchair. everyone was coming over all day and encouraging me that it was a small set back, and they are right. i also heard how it happens to so many people, very lucky i'm staying a 4th week, and i have good support here.
i started talking to various staff straight away to understand why this had happened. the reason why i lost the feeling in my legs was because my spine was compressed by the tumor pressing on it. so this was happening again. i'm very confident it's not the tumor growing back, it would not happen over night. it would happen over a few days like it did before. also with this diet, i'm confident the tumor is stopped dead in its tracks. i feel much better overall. so what is pressing against my spinal cord! the only thing i could think of is i had too much nut ice cream (3 servings, should only have 1) on Sat night followed by cooked (i didn't know!!!!) tortilla wraps. they are both very difficult to digest and produce a lot of gas in the stomach if you are not strong to handle them. i felt my stomach and it was very hard. i wheeled myself to the colonic room as quick as i could, and asked the clonic lady what she thought, she touched my stomach and oh boy, she was amazed. very lucky for me, the lady whose appointment was at 9, gave me her place and i went in for a clonic. i had enough gas coming out of me to power Florida for a day. i came out feeling much better, still no feeling in my legs but a lot more relaxed and upper body strength. i have another clonic tomorrow with abdominal massage before hand, i'm hoping that this will make even a bigger improvement. unfortunately i have to go through the process of rebuilding my nerves and muscles again, but that's a small worry.
i have learnt another big lesson, how sensitive our body is in recovery mode. it requires patience and taking it slow. the 2 attributes i miss dearly in life. it has also taught me not to loose faith, believe in what you are doing even when you're having a set back. we can't help having negative thoughts, i think that is almost impossible, but we must stay positive. don't be flaky.
so i fasted on juice today and blended my food so i would ease my digestion. the same tomorrow and Wednesday. i'm going to do Frank's exercise routine every morning, lunch time and evening to get my abs strong and take it slow.
i'm writing this sitting in my wheelchair, i'm just as positive as i was on Sat, a little unhappy as i've lost some of my independence and freedom, but i'm on the right track and i'm sure i will make bigger recovery this time round. i'm going to take my time and be more careful.
i enjoyed reading everyone's comments. you don't know how happy it makes me when i get new comments.
i would love to reply to everyone, but i need to time to do my things, i will get back to everyone individually when i have the time. but please keep the comments coming. i love hearing from new people and people i don't know who have discovered the blog through friends. it's very inspiring for me to know people are enjoying the blog.
all my love
to life force and positive attitude
reza
Saturday, 19 April 2008
3rd Week & Graduation
This Friday was the end of the 3 week program. everyone that we arrived with (apart from a couple of people and myself) have now left Hippocrates. On Friday everyone gets together and talks about their experience over the last 3 weeks. it was extremely emotional and amazing how this place changes everyone's life. i can pretty much tell you that most people feel the same way as i do, in their own way. they can see the transformation in their physical bodies and mental state. they are all looking forward to their new lives, healthier with higher consciousness of their existence. admittedly not everyone will find it easy, but even a small step, it's a step in the right direction. everyone made a little speech, tears of joy and endless gratitude for the education and care they had received. it was moving. i highly recommend this place to anyone and everyone who wishes to change in their lives for the better. you don't have to be ill like me to start, you can avoid all the trauma.
I know i have not posted since Tuesday, my epic walk and dance. my legs are feeling tried. it's been none stop since i got here. the place is big and i have to walk with crutches every where, from main building to the therapy room, to the poll, to the juice room, to the gym, then home and back etc. most people that are healthy or at least they can walk are complaining how tired they are, now there is me dragging my feet around, in the gym, exercising in the pool and pushing myself (reza style)! and it just all caught up with me. so i've been taking it a little slower, i need to be more patient with my legs. my target of coming home walking won't happen. it will take me longer. but i took those few steps without my crutches and danced without my crutches, and that has given me a world of confidence that i will walk again. i'm happy with this feeling.
Last week coming up. i have a lot more treatments still to do, it's amazing, it just doesn't stop. but once i'm out of here i won't have access to it, so might as well make the most of it.
i'm reading a book called: The China Study. i can't put it down. it's a study on the correlation between food/nutrition and chronic diseases (cancer, heart attack etc). it's easy read and fast, very clear and to the point. highly recommend it. I've been meaning to post a reading list, will do tomorrow. So anyone looking for a good book to read, get this asap, it will blow your mind away and changes your attitude towards your food.
I am so bought into this diet and the effect of food on health. obviously for me it's a matter of life and death, but the more i read, the more sense it all makes. it's great for me. imagine you have a major problem and you start solving it bit by bit. great feeling no? but the rabitt hole is so deep, we have been so poorly informed, it will take months and years, and tons of good books to really understand food.
My friend Kristyan introduced me to the concept of RAW food (and i will be forever grateful). he said just look into it, so i did a little research and for sure just thinking about it, cooking/heat burns food. raw food is whole food, everything in it is in its natural state. i started salads but eating a lot of fruits. one would agree that fruits are living food and full of vitamins and nutrition. one would think, good move. having read and learnt what i have learnt the last 3 weeks, my sudden increase intake of fruits was probably the biggest contributor to my cancer spreading so fast through out my body and hitting my spine etc.. (you know the rest). i was eating tons of dates (super food), apples, carrots, mangos, dried fruits, honey etc, full of sugar. the cancer cells were having a flied day and the candida in my body was flourishing starving my blood of oxygen making the cancer cells even happier. in addition i was trying to eat protein to maintain my weight, once again, as i have learnt animal protein is a huge contributor to cancer
Amazing, when you think you are being healthy, but because of your simple lack of knowledge, you're doing your body, the most important thing you own in the world, devastating damage. why are we so poorly informed!
i have been chatting to the new people arriving here, new groups of people arrive every Sunday. there are 4 different people with stage 4 cancer, same as me. you can imagine how they feel. i was convinced i had made the right decision coming here before i got here, i did a lot of reading and went to the lecture by Dr Clement in London which sealed the deal for me. but for these guys, they are just getting into the program, some talk to their doctors and are still debating if they should go ahead with their chemo. some of these doctors are so pushy, calling them and telling them they have to come back and take it, and sign a contract that they will take a full course! can you believe it. but gradually, after going to a few lectures and reading the handouts, also seeing the change in their body, the confidence levels increase and their attitude changes. this has such an inspiring effect on everyone. i just wish all these people stuck in these hospitals around the world, being pumped these devastating drugs into their veins could see this and experience this. can you imagine, when the nurses give you the chemo, they wear radioactive protective gloves incase the chemo spills, it doesn't hurt their skin. now they're putting that stuff into your body! how does that make any sense! not good for their skin, but good for your internal organs!
after being here fore 3 weeks, i feel 100% confident but 70% competent to sprout and prepare food for myself. this is no game play or role play. i need to get home and start sprouting and continue this strict diet. i have been buying myself all the equipments, basically a whole new kitchen. i've been researching food suppliers, seeds, spices, herbs etc. i have to buy an additional suitcase to bring back my supplements. it feels like a full time job. having legs would make things a lot easier, but that in itself is a humbling experience. to top it all, i have to organise my move to Ibiza. the sooner i get out of London the better, fresh sea air, sunshine and vegetation. i'm the only person on the plane going to Ibiza for healthy living, how ironic!
i'm looking forward to getting visitors, it will be like doing a health eduction program in Ibiza. you will come there and learn all about living food, read the books and eat the good food. how great? i'm looking forward to it.
it's late now, i love you and leave you all.
look forward to some fun informative comments.
our bodies are truly amazing. did you know, we totally regenerate a whole new body every 7 years.
every living cell in our body is brand new after 7 years.
bring it on 2015.
to life force
I know i have not posted since Tuesday, my epic walk and dance. my legs are feeling tried. it's been none stop since i got here. the place is big and i have to walk with crutches every where, from main building to the therapy room, to the poll, to the juice room, to the gym, then home and back etc. most people that are healthy or at least they can walk are complaining how tired they are, now there is me dragging my feet around, in the gym, exercising in the pool and pushing myself (reza style)! and it just all caught up with me. so i've been taking it a little slower, i need to be more patient with my legs. my target of coming home walking won't happen. it will take me longer. but i took those few steps without my crutches and danced without my crutches, and that has given me a world of confidence that i will walk again. i'm happy with this feeling.
Last week coming up. i have a lot more treatments still to do, it's amazing, it just doesn't stop. but once i'm out of here i won't have access to it, so might as well make the most of it.
i'm reading a book called: The China Study. i can't put it down. it's a study on the correlation between food/nutrition and chronic diseases (cancer, heart attack etc). it's easy read and fast, very clear and to the point. highly recommend it. I've been meaning to post a reading list, will do tomorrow. So anyone looking for a good book to read, get this asap, it will blow your mind away and changes your attitude towards your food.
I am so bought into this diet and the effect of food on health. obviously for me it's a matter of life and death, but the more i read, the more sense it all makes. it's great for me. imagine you have a major problem and you start solving it bit by bit. great feeling no? but the rabitt hole is so deep, we have been so poorly informed, it will take months and years, and tons of good books to really understand food.
My friend Kristyan introduced me to the concept of RAW food (and i will be forever grateful). he said just look into it, so i did a little research and for sure just thinking about it, cooking/heat burns food. raw food is whole food, everything in it is in its natural state. i started salads but eating a lot of fruits. one would agree that fruits are living food and full of vitamins and nutrition. one would think, good move. having read and learnt what i have learnt the last 3 weeks, my sudden increase intake of fruits was probably the biggest contributor to my cancer spreading so fast through out my body and hitting my spine etc.. (you know the rest). i was eating tons of dates (super food), apples, carrots, mangos, dried fruits, honey etc, full of sugar. the cancer cells were having a flied day and the candida in my body was flourishing starving my blood of oxygen making the cancer cells even happier. in addition i was trying to eat protein to maintain my weight, once again, as i have learnt animal protein is a huge contributor to cancer
Amazing, when you think you are being healthy, but because of your simple lack of knowledge, you're doing your body, the most important thing you own in the world, devastating damage. why are we so poorly informed!
i have been chatting to the new people arriving here, new groups of people arrive every Sunday. there are 4 different people with stage 4 cancer, same as me. you can imagine how they feel. i was convinced i had made the right decision coming here before i got here, i did a lot of reading and went to the lecture by Dr Clement in London which sealed the deal for me. but for these guys, they are just getting into the program, some talk to their doctors and are still debating if they should go ahead with their chemo. some of these doctors are so pushy, calling them and telling them they have to come back and take it, and sign a contract that they will take a full course! can you believe it. but gradually, after going to a few lectures and reading the handouts, also seeing the change in their body, the confidence levels increase and their attitude changes. this has such an inspiring effect on everyone. i just wish all these people stuck in these hospitals around the world, being pumped these devastating drugs into their veins could see this and experience this. can you imagine, when the nurses give you the chemo, they wear radioactive protective gloves incase the chemo spills, it doesn't hurt their skin. now they're putting that stuff into your body! how does that make any sense! not good for their skin, but good for your internal organs!
after being here fore 3 weeks, i feel 100% confident but 70% competent to sprout and prepare food for myself. this is no game play or role play. i need to get home and start sprouting and continue this strict diet. i have been buying myself all the equipments, basically a whole new kitchen. i've been researching food suppliers, seeds, spices, herbs etc. i have to buy an additional suitcase to bring back my supplements. it feels like a full time job. having legs would make things a lot easier, but that in itself is a humbling experience. to top it all, i have to organise my move to Ibiza. the sooner i get out of London the better, fresh sea air, sunshine and vegetation. i'm the only person on the plane going to Ibiza for healthy living, how ironic!
i'm looking forward to getting visitors, it will be like doing a health eduction program in Ibiza. you will come there and learn all about living food, read the books and eat the good food. how great? i'm looking forward to it.
it's late now, i love you and leave you all.
look forward to some fun informative comments.
our bodies are truly amazing. did you know, we totally regenerate a whole new body every 7 years.
every living cell in our body is brand new after 7 years.
bring it on 2015.
to life force
Tuesday, 15 April 2008
WALKING
well, the most wonderful thing happened today, i walked without my crutches.
i had a good night sleep, did my Chi Gong meditation/visualization when i woke up. you know when you wake up but not quite ready to get out of bed, well i use that time to do my meditation, it energizes me.
i start with deep breading to build the Chi. i'm getting very good at it, and can feel it move up and down my body. i recommend it highly, perhaps i was very fortunate and had a good teacher. it really works.
my legs felt a little stiff, hard work going to the bathroom and brushing my teeth, just the usual.
got to Hippocrates, had to do my blood test. You do a blood test on week 1, then on week 3 to see how you have progressed. i will get the results tomorrow. so excited to see it.
i went to gym, but first i had my morning wheatgrass juice. i'm getting used to the taste now, much easier to drink.
normal routine, cycling and stretching, took it easy as i've had a bit of pain in my legs the last few days.
then i had H-Wave, but they have just brought this new machine which works on a slightly different electrical frequency, it's something to do with bio-magnetic electric resonance. so it tunes in to your body electric energy (know as Chi in chinese medicine). it manipulates or energizes your cells so reduces pain and increase rejuvenation/ healing. i can feel it working on me. it feels very similar to when i do my meditation and Chi build up. i'm finding a bit wiered how i'm starting to feel these different energies so easily. the power of the mind is incredible, we just don't use it. we just don't know our bodies, we just treat our bodies as a 3rd party machine. this experience is teaching me so much about my body. why shouldn't i be able to feel the different parts of it. it's just a matter of learning, don't you agree? and we seem totally ignorant about it. it's not our fault, it's just lack of education or we are simply diverted to other ways of life, drinking and partying. I was the prime example of it.
this followed by a lecture on Sprouting. it's so easy, you can make Sprouts in a 3 days. the most powerful food on the planet earth for less than a few pounds, you will have a week's supply. no wonder they don't advertise it!
i had Oxygen therapy after, filling up my body with some delicious oxygen, could visualize the cancer cells running scared, suffocating to their death.
then lunch with Nancy and Gus. Nancy is Parker's mum. it was lovely to see her. we didn't really have enough time, but it was so nice, gorgeous lady and seemed so happy with Gus. wish we had more time to talk, but lectures and healing were calling.
we had a lecture on Conscious Communication. he recommended some books, i will post a full list of books soon. also talked, talked about his experiences in life, how we should live life the way we see fit, we should talk and air our thoughts, we should speak our mind and don't bottle things up, we should not judge or try and predict reactions before we communicate, we should learn to listen, not planning our answer when the other person is taking, we should have an open mind. a lot of common sense, it was good to hear it all, a nice reminder.
at 4, i had a massage called Diversified Touch Therapy. this guy called Vincent did a lecture on body posture and how different events in our lives or sometimes just one event in our life will effect the way we walk, or our posture forever. it's muscle memories, an accident, fear, shock, sadness, illness, anything that could effect us physically or emotionally can effect us. this is caused by emotions stored in muscles and our nerves. he explains it as an integration of several disciplines designed to restore harmony and balance to the Mind - Body - Spirit of an individual.
when i heard his lecture. i thought this could be for me. i don't want to be walking funny for the rest of my life once this is over. so i booked myself in straight away.
he had remembered me from the lecture as i asked a few questions and told him i was going to see him.
soon as i walked in the room, he said i have been thinking about you all week and what we gona do.
so lie head down and started to work on my back. he said this is where the problem is coming from, i have a tight chest and rib cage etc. he touched a couple of sore spots and straight away he softened his massage. i was surprised and told him about Frank, and how wonderful it was and he really opened my body etc. He said he has a very different technique and his approach is more subtle. OK, i had a little doubt, but as i've learnt in the last few weeks, have an open mind and believe. so he gets to work on my back, rib cage, arms, then legs, softly softly very gentle, subtle and precise. i started to feel immediately my body opening up, i was breathing easier, my back much more relaxed, my legs more alive, the session was 1 1/2 hours, but he worked on me for 2 hours and gave me some stretching exercise to do in the evenings and mornings. we had a beautiful conversation all the way through, he is in his 70, very gentle guy.
i got dressed, got my crutches heading towards the pool for a little exercise and soaking before dinner. as i started to walk out of his room on my crutches, i had this energy sensation in my legs, they felt much stronger, i had more control of them, they wanted to stand on their own and walk. so i lifted my crutches and started to take a few steps, i was walking without my crutches. i could not believe it. i had been waiting for this moment for so long, i knew it was going to happen sooner or later, and i was just waiting for it. i wasn't sure what i was going to do, where i would be when this would happen, and it was happening. i shouted Vincent look i'm walking. i wanted to go back to the room and show him, but he looked out of the window and was so pleased, he shouted becareful, go easy. i wanted to go back and hug him again, but i was also in a rush to go show everyone i was walking.
i rushed to the therapy room, and walked in without my crutches, everyone was so pleased. they had all been waiting for the moment. i went straight to the pool, bumped into more people, i started to show off and walk without the help of the crutches. everyone was clapping and coming over giving me a hug. i walked around in the pool for 30 minutes, so happy, i had the biggest smile on my face ever, punching the air every so often. i'm healing and it's so great. i'm buzzing as i'm writing.
after pool went for dinner, had a little catwalk for everyone, people just couldn't believe it, so happy for me.
at around 8, they had live music, Dr Brian, the director here plays the drums, and he is very good. so walked over to him and thank him for saving my life. of course he said he's done nothing, it's all me. he gave me a massive hug. he was not surprised at all, he sees this all the time. his wife, Dr Anne Marie who is the co director and my doctor here was so pleased to see me on the dance floor. she then got her Violin out and joined the band. this family is just so talented and clever. and they are doing the most wonderful thing in life you can imagine, saving people's lives and giving them hope to live. they are doing a pretty good job if you ask me.
i had a 20 min booggy on the dance floor. all the ladies wanted a dance with me. i was moving and grooving in a very particular style. i was so happy, i'm standing on my feet, i'm moving around without crutches. i'm healing.
i couldn't wait to get to my computer and tell everyone about it.
What a day, it would be like seeing your kid take his fist steps.
the question of will i ever walk again has now been answered.
when i asked my radiotherapist doctor in London, will i walk again. he said, you have much bigger problems than that, but you should recover some feelings in the next 6 to 8 weeks. well i'm walking and dancing. i'm pretty sure my cancer is in regression too. i feel it, and i've learnt to trust my feelings.
to life force
what a day, Tuesday 15th of April, 08
all my love
reza
to Life Force and living food.
thank you Vincent.
love
reza
i had a good night sleep, did my Chi Gong meditation/visualization when i woke up. you know when you wake up but not quite ready to get out of bed, well i use that time to do my meditation, it energizes me.
i start with deep breading to build the Chi. i'm getting very good at it, and can feel it move up and down my body. i recommend it highly, perhaps i was very fortunate and had a good teacher. it really works.
my legs felt a little stiff, hard work going to the bathroom and brushing my teeth, just the usual.
got to Hippocrates, had to do my blood test. You do a blood test on week 1, then on week 3 to see how you have progressed. i will get the results tomorrow. so excited to see it.
i went to gym, but first i had my morning wheatgrass juice. i'm getting used to the taste now, much easier to drink.
normal routine, cycling and stretching, took it easy as i've had a bit of pain in my legs the last few days.
then i had H-Wave, but they have just brought this new machine which works on a slightly different electrical frequency, it's something to do with bio-magnetic electric resonance. so it tunes in to your body electric energy (know as Chi in chinese medicine). it manipulates or energizes your cells so reduces pain and increase rejuvenation/ healing. i can feel it working on me. it feels very similar to when i do my meditation and Chi build up. i'm finding a bit wiered how i'm starting to feel these different energies so easily. the power of the mind is incredible, we just don't use it. we just don't know our bodies, we just treat our bodies as a 3rd party machine. this experience is teaching me so much about my body. why shouldn't i be able to feel the different parts of it. it's just a matter of learning, don't you agree? and we seem totally ignorant about it. it's not our fault, it's just lack of education or we are simply diverted to other ways of life, drinking and partying. I was the prime example of it.
this followed by a lecture on Sprouting. it's so easy, you can make Sprouts in a 3 days. the most powerful food on the planet earth for less than a few pounds, you will have a week's supply. no wonder they don't advertise it!
i had Oxygen therapy after, filling up my body with some delicious oxygen, could visualize the cancer cells running scared, suffocating to their death.
then lunch with Nancy and Gus. Nancy is Parker's mum. it was lovely to see her. we didn't really have enough time, but it was so nice, gorgeous lady and seemed so happy with Gus. wish we had more time to talk, but lectures and healing were calling.
we had a lecture on Conscious Communication. he recommended some books, i will post a full list of books soon. also talked, talked about his experiences in life, how we should live life the way we see fit, we should talk and air our thoughts, we should speak our mind and don't bottle things up, we should not judge or try and predict reactions before we communicate, we should learn to listen, not planning our answer when the other person is taking, we should have an open mind. a lot of common sense, it was good to hear it all, a nice reminder.
at 4, i had a massage called Diversified Touch Therapy. this guy called Vincent did a lecture on body posture and how different events in our lives or sometimes just one event in our life will effect the way we walk, or our posture forever. it's muscle memories, an accident, fear, shock, sadness, illness, anything that could effect us physically or emotionally can effect us. this is caused by emotions stored in muscles and our nerves. he explains it as an integration of several disciplines designed to restore harmony and balance to the Mind - Body - Spirit of an individual.
when i heard his lecture. i thought this could be for me. i don't want to be walking funny for the rest of my life once this is over. so i booked myself in straight away.
he had remembered me from the lecture as i asked a few questions and told him i was going to see him.
soon as i walked in the room, he said i have been thinking about you all week and what we gona do.
so lie head down and started to work on my back. he said this is where the problem is coming from, i have a tight chest and rib cage etc. he touched a couple of sore spots and straight away he softened his massage. i was surprised and told him about Frank, and how wonderful it was and he really opened my body etc. He said he has a very different technique and his approach is more subtle. OK, i had a little doubt, but as i've learnt in the last few weeks, have an open mind and believe. so he gets to work on my back, rib cage, arms, then legs, softly softly very gentle, subtle and precise. i started to feel immediately my body opening up, i was breathing easier, my back much more relaxed, my legs more alive, the session was 1 1/2 hours, but he worked on me for 2 hours and gave me some stretching exercise to do in the evenings and mornings. we had a beautiful conversation all the way through, he is in his 70, very gentle guy.
i got dressed, got my crutches heading towards the pool for a little exercise and soaking before dinner. as i started to walk out of his room on my crutches, i had this energy sensation in my legs, they felt much stronger, i had more control of them, they wanted to stand on their own and walk. so i lifted my crutches and started to take a few steps, i was walking without my crutches. i could not believe it. i had been waiting for this moment for so long, i knew it was going to happen sooner or later, and i was just waiting for it. i wasn't sure what i was going to do, where i would be when this would happen, and it was happening. i shouted Vincent look i'm walking. i wanted to go back to the room and show him, but he looked out of the window and was so pleased, he shouted becareful, go easy. i wanted to go back and hug him again, but i was also in a rush to go show everyone i was walking.
i rushed to the therapy room, and walked in without my crutches, everyone was so pleased. they had all been waiting for the moment. i went straight to the pool, bumped into more people, i started to show off and walk without the help of the crutches. everyone was clapping and coming over giving me a hug. i walked around in the pool for 30 minutes, so happy, i had the biggest smile on my face ever, punching the air every so often. i'm healing and it's so great. i'm buzzing as i'm writing.
after pool went for dinner, had a little catwalk for everyone, people just couldn't believe it, so happy for me.
at around 8, they had live music, Dr Brian, the director here plays the drums, and he is very good. so walked over to him and thank him for saving my life. of course he said he's done nothing, it's all me. he gave me a massive hug. he was not surprised at all, he sees this all the time. his wife, Dr Anne Marie who is the co director and my doctor here was so pleased to see me on the dance floor. she then got her Violin out and joined the band. this family is just so talented and clever. and they are doing the most wonderful thing in life you can imagine, saving people's lives and giving them hope to live. they are doing a pretty good job if you ask me.
i had a 20 min booggy on the dance floor. all the ladies wanted a dance with me. i was moving and grooving in a very particular style. i was so happy, i'm standing on my feet, i'm moving around without crutches. i'm healing.
i couldn't wait to get to my computer and tell everyone about it.
What a day, it would be like seeing your kid take his fist steps.
the question of will i ever walk again has now been answered.
when i asked my radiotherapist doctor in London, will i walk again. he said, you have much bigger problems than that, but you should recover some feelings in the next 6 to 8 weeks. well i'm walking and dancing. i'm pretty sure my cancer is in regression too. i feel it, and i've learnt to trust my feelings.
to life force
what a day, Tuesday 15th of April, 08
all my love
reza
to Life Force and living food.
thank you Vincent.
love
reza
Sunday, 13 April 2008
Sunday and Half Way
Sunday
I've been here for 2 weeks now, and this place just keeps getting better and better, and I, feel better and better.
i had a muscular and neurological massage today with a guy called Frank. a big guy.
i didn't sleep very well last night, i was a little stiff, i'm rebuilding my muscles quickly and they are probably getting all tangled up somehow.
anyway, when i walked into the treatment room with Frank, i could barely get my feet on the bed, he had to lift me up. i quickly explained to him my symptoms, and he went straight into my legs. OUUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH
he was as rough as they come. he was not shy. singing away in country western, Oh Boy what have we got here, and drilling away into my muscles. i was screaming, and he was singing i hear ya. his fingers were like robots drilling into my nerves and waking between my bones. he gave a new definition to pain. a delicious kind of pain, when you know it's good for you. as he pushes on your pressure points, the nerve is tight and slowly loosens up. as it loosens, the pain goes away gradually. you just keep breathing slowly and try not to scream too much. But Oy Boy did it feel good. i was a new man. my toes were starting to move for the first time in 5 weeks, little nerves were popping loose, tingling sensation all over my body. I love Frank, he did not mess around, he got on with the job like a real pro, no pain no game. then he worked his way up through my back, and sorted my neck out too. what a Sunday treat.
a quick jump in the hot sea mineral water pool, relax those muscles and then lunch.
i rested in the afternoon chatting to other guests here. very chilled and relaxed day.
i've got some info for you on Food Combining
it's fascinating, why don't they teach us this stuff at school? so simple, but yet so important.
think of you digestive system as a motor way. it's approximately the length of your body. think of food as different types of cars, and there is only one lane.
first of all, drink your water 10-15 minutes before your food, then no water for 2 hours after your food. water dilutes all you digestive enzymes making the digestion process twice as difficult and less productive.
rule 1. Do not mix carbohydrates and protein. this is the most common eating habit. all vegetables are carbohydrates except for avocado, onions, garlic, ginger, and flowers, these are the bisexual ones..
dairy and meats are protein and are often eaten with rice, potatoes, bread. not that we should be eating these.
Peanut butter and bread, most cereal mixes, this is the vegetarian world etc...
it creates over 120 chemicals in the body, the main one being sulfate. the bad smell. these chemicals are considered the primary cause of most illnesses.
Protein should be consumed at lunch time mainly.
Rule 2. Fruits should be max 15% of your diet, only when you are healthy, on top form. anyone with diabetes or chronic disease should not eat any.
3 categories of fruits - 1 and 2 can mix, 2 and 3 can mix occasionally. better not mix. most fruits are picked unripe, to give it shelf life, makes sense, no? picking them unripe means they are not properly formed and nutritionally malformed.
Acid/ Citrus - Oranges etc..
Sub Acid - Most fruits
Sweet - dry fruits, dates. should only be eaten by athletes, highly exercised people.
if you are having fruit juice, dilute 90% water, 10% juice!
an interesting information. they have found a way to stop fruits to perish. they expose it to a certain radio wave which kills the living enzymes in the fruits, stops the fruit being alive. so the fruit looks the same as it should do, but its been neutralized. if you leave it on your kitchen top, it will slowly dehydrate, get smaller and just get old, it will not rot. there is nothing to rot, it's dead. this is how much they are tampering with food!
Rule 3. Fruits & Vegetables do not mix. they have different enzymes which should not be mixed. fruits are the fastest to digest 1.5 hrs, vegetables over 2.5 hrs.
tomatoes are fruits. it's another example of how the industry miss represents information. they should be eaten on their own.
Rule 4. Melon to be eaten on their own. it takes 15 minutes for a melon to go through the body.
Sometimes i think all this information might be just too overwhelming. you're probably thinking this is all impossible to follow.
the point is we have never ben thought how to eat healthy. everything we do is pretty much wrong and it's based on what the industry trying to sell us.
these guys have been doing 60 years of research into healthy eating, Food as a healing tool, they know what they are talking about.
the way i look at it is, we need to think about why we eat. if we want to eat because of taste and the "faux" feel good factor, then at least beware of what you are doing to your body. if you actually want to get a benefit, energy life from your food, then these points should be taken into account. it all make sense, it's mother nature. i clearly understand the concept that different types of food ie protein takes longer to breakdown and digest that let's carbohydrate. you don't mix diesel and petrol in the same tank, do you?
what they say here is
It's Not The Food In Your Life,
It's The Life In Your Food.
I've been here for 2 weeks now, and this place just keeps getting better and better, and I, feel better and better.
i had a muscular and neurological massage today with a guy called Frank. a big guy.
i didn't sleep very well last night, i was a little stiff, i'm rebuilding my muscles quickly and they are probably getting all tangled up somehow.
anyway, when i walked into the treatment room with Frank, i could barely get my feet on the bed, he had to lift me up. i quickly explained to him my symptoms, and he went straight into my legs. OUUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH
he was as rough as they come. he was not shy. singing away in country western, Oh Boy what have we got here, and drilling away into my muscles. i was screaming, and he was singing i hear ya. his fingers were like robots drilling into my nerves and waking between my bones. he gave a new definition to pain. a delicious kind of pain, when you know it's good for you. as he pushes on your pressure points, the nerve is tight and slowly loosens up. as it loosens, the pain goes away gradually. you just keep breathing slowly and try not to scream too much. But Oy Boy did it feel good. i was a new man. my toes were starting to move for the first time in 5 weeks, little nerves were popping loose, tingling sensation all over my body. I love Frank, he did not mess around, he got on with the job like a real pro, no pain no game. then he worked his way up through my back, and sorted my neck out too. what a Sunday treat.
a quick jump in the hot sea mineral water pool, relax those muscles and then lunch.
i rested in the afternoon chatting to other guests here. very chilled and relaxed day.
i've got some info for you on Food Combining
it's fascinating, why don't they teach us this stuff at school? so simple, but yet so important.
think of you digestive system as a motor way. it's approximately the length of your body. think of food as different types of cars, and there is only one lane.
first of all, drink your water 10-15 minutes before your food, then no water for 2 hours after your food. water dilutes all you digestive enzymes making the digestion process twice as difficult and less productive.
rule 1. Do not mix carbohydrates and protein. this is the most common eating habit. all vegetables are carbohydrates except for avocado, onions, garlic, ginger, and flowers, these are the bisexual ones..
dairy and meats are protein and are often eaten with rice, potatoes, bread. not that we should be eating these.
Peanut butter and bread, most cereal mixes, this is the vegetarian world etc...
it creates over 120 chemicals in the body, the main one being sulfate. the bad smell. these chemicals are considered the primary cause of most illnesses.
Protein should be consumed at lunch time mainly.
Rule 2. Fruits should be max 15% of your diet, only when you are healthy, on top form. anyone with diabetes or chronic disease should not eat any.
3 categories of fruits - 1 and 2 can mix, 2 and 3 can mix occasionally. better not mix. most fruits are picked unripe, to give it shelf life, makes sense, no? picking them unripe means they are not properly formed and nutritionally malformed.
Acid/ Citrus - Oranges etc..
Sub Acid - Most fruits
Sweet - dry fruits, dates. should only be eaten by athletes, highly exercised people.
if you are having fruit juice, dilute 90% water, 10% juice!
an interesting information. they have found a way to stop fruits to perish. they expose it to a certain radio wave which kills the living enzymes in the fruits, stops the fruit being alive. so the fruit looks the same as it should do, but its been neutralized. if you leave it on your kitchen top, it will slowly dehydrate, get smaller and just get old, it will not rot. there is nothing to rot, it's dead. this is how much they are tampering with food!
Rule 3. Fruits & Vegetables do not mix. they have different enzymes which should not be mixed. fruits are the fastest to digest 1.5 hrs, vegetables over 2.5 hrs.
tomatoes are fruits. it's another example of how the industry miss represents information. they should be eaten on their own.
Rule 4. Melon to be eaten on their own. it takes 15 minutes for a melon to go through the body.
Sometimes i think all this information might be just too overwhelming. you're probably thinking this is all impossible to follow.
the point is we have never ben thought how to eat healthy. everything we do is pretty much wrong and it's based on what the industry trying to sell us.
these guys have been doing 60 years of research into healthy eating, Food as a healing tool, they know what they are talking about.
the way i look at it is, we need to think about why we eat. if we want to eat because of taste and the "faux" feel good factor, then at least beware of what you are doing to your body. if you actually want to get a benefit, energy life from your food, then these points should be taken into account. it all make sense, it's mother nature. i clearly understand the concept that different types of food ie protein takes longer to breakdown and digest that let's carbohydrate. you don't mix diesel and petrol in the same tank, do you?
what they say here is
It's Not The Food In Your Life,
It's The Life In Your Food.
Thursday, 10 April 2008
Thursday 10th April
Another great day. i had a lot more feeling in my legs this morning. i could move them a bit easier, less pain. so that put a big smile on my face when i got up.
started the day with 15min cycling and 5 minutes steps machine. that was hard work. 30 minutes stretching, breakfast and then i had 1 of hour H-Wave. they wire you up to these radio amplifier looking type machines sending electric pulses to your muscles. you lying on the bed and your legs are jumping up and down. very strange feeling. it's for pain control, but also helps rejuvenate nerves and muscle activity. normally a session is 20 minutes, but the person after me didn't turn up, so i had an hour! it really helped, i can feel the bottom of my feet now, and easier to move my toes.
i went for a sauna and swim, pool exercises then lunch followed by a lecture on Cell Food Supplement. Now you should all get on the internet and order this supplement. it was developed by the guy who helped Einstein split the water molecule to build the Atomic bomb. later he developed cancer and healed himself by developing a product which used the same principle as splitting the water molecule. Cancer cells develop in low oxygen environments, feeding off sugar and living in acidic conditions. Cell Food it's the most powerful oxygen carrier to the body, it has 13 Enzymes and 50 something of the 73 amino acids the body needs. just look it up and get it. it's not that expensive, 20 a bottle and lasts for 40 days. highly recommended. very good lecture.
then i had Infra Red oxygen therapy for an hour, i totally fell asleep and didn't want to get up. it's great when you have a power nap in the afternoon.
then had a cooking class, so many delicious recipes, i can't wait to move to Ibiza and set up my new kitchen with all new equipments. this food is so delicious, once your taste buds change, you de-hook yourself of cooked or processed lifeless food, you actually realize how delicious vegetables are when they are RAW, the pure taste.
we had dinner and i came home.
just had a bath and did some Qi Gong meditation lying in my bed. i feel amazing. again i recommend meditation to anyone who has not tried it. when i look back, Reza doing meditation!!!! but it's one of the most amazing relaxation tools ever. as i was meditating i could hear my organs working, like a brand new factory. i could hear my stomach ticking, ti ti ti ti ti ti ti it ti, my liver, i had never felt my liver before, i can now feel it pumping. my lungs feel like a field of white lilies blowing in mild wind every time i breath. my heart is singing away tick tick, tick tick, tick tick, happy as Larry. my skin feels so fresh, breathing away on its own tingling in joy. i don't think i have ever felt like this in my life before. it's a beautiful feeling. i feel blessed.Suddenly i remembered how sick i was when we were back in London. i was completely bed ridden. i could hardly walk to the toilet and back, and that felt like a meeting with the devil. i could not feel my feet. you know when you go skying and it's freezing cold, your feet feel frozen, well i had that feeling constantly in my feet, the rest of my legs felt dead. you know when you sit on your leg or arm for too long and it goes dead, then you try and move it and it's painful. just like that. then anything i could feel was like pins and needles. from chest down. it was so weird. OK i had spinal cord compression, 7 sessions of heavy radiotherapy! i was on 4 different pain killers, steroids, 2 different anti sickness tablets and a load of constipation pills. i was ill.
London was cold and grey, i was stuck in my flat, striped of all emotions, my identity, sense of belonging, confused as it all happened so quickly within a few days, i lost 10 kilos! so skinny, i was facing the hardest and toughest challenge of life, staying alive. but it was never a feeling of despair, it felt more like a challenge, question time, what happens now, what am i supposed to do here. who am i? what am i? this is not the end of the road, surly not now? i can honestly say it was one of the loneliest times of my life, but i suppose it is only in such loneliness that one can truly find himself. THE WOUNDED HEALER. it's not lonely like you don't have anyone to talk to, or to love. it's lonely as it's your own challenge, no one can help. you know it's only you that can and has to do it, it's only you, you, you, you.
Veronica was amazing, truly an angel to guide and care for me and my brother was the pillow of support, impossible is nothing. Right Moh?
Monday 24th of March, Easter Bank Holiday, I met Dr Clement when he did his lecture on Living Food and Wheatgrass in London, and he showed me the path. The odds of him being there that weekend! He comes to UK maybe once a year!!!!
I feel blessed to be here, i feel i'm healing, i see the cancer cells dying by 10s of thousands every hour. if my memory serves me right, every person produces approx 2500 cancerous cells everyday. our immune system gets rid of them on a daily basis. you have to have 50 million cancer cells before they can see it on scan. i have a good 2 to 3 years ahead of me before i am totally cancer free. easy. consider it done.
i'm so looking forward to my new life. it has started already, but there is so much i like to add to it.
this blog was another great idea. thank you Veronica. i was so worried i was getting away from all my friends, i thought i would have to start a brand new life. but by doing this blog and sharing all my thoughts with everyone, i feel closer, more loved and in tune with my family and friends. it goes to show how you can turn the most daunting of circumstances to a blessing. How life can be beautiful, life is what you make it. don't let it decide for you, this is what the western living is doing, it's deciding life for us. i won't go into this today, but think about it.
Finally i like to say how much i enjoy reading everyone's comments. everyone that writes on here gives me a boost of energy, and puts a massive smile on my face. sorry if i don't reply to each person individually, it's just a question of time. this weekend i will have more time, but i like to tell everyone about what we are learning, some really great information and things you can all start doing. but i will reply to everyone in due time.
a lot of people have asked me if they can show this blog to their friends, please go ahead tell as many people as possible. if this blog helps just one person heal themselves, how great would that be? imagine the goodness of this act. so the more people know about it, the better.
for everyone that knows me well, imagine me at my happiest, most excited, most energetic, most inspired and smiling, that's how i feel.
to all of you and life force
so much love and positive energy
reza
Monday, 7 April 2008
Week 2 at Hippocrates
Monday 7th of April, start of my second week at Hippocrates.
i get up everyday around 6.30. i do my meditation (30 minutes of deep breathing) and 20 min visualization (imagining the cancer cells dying in my body and floating away in my veins or a little Pac Man going round eating them all, this one is fun).
7.30 out the house.
i'm starting to walk much easier on the crutches, more fluid. it's still very painful and i can't stand for long periods, no longer than 5 minutes, but i'm getting stronger.
they were cheering me as i walked in today, the receptionist always tell me how i'm walking in faster, so to show off, i took a few steps without the use of the crutches and they clapped. it was a great feeling.
i went straight to the gym, stretched, on the bike for 15 minutes. god it was hard work, then i did the step machine for 5 minutes. i was very pleased with myself. i really had to push it, it's so painful at times, but no pain no game! and for sure no walking!!
they have this vibration bed machine here, so after exercising, you lie on it and it vibrates your whole body. it's a good way of getting oxygen and fluid around the body. so i do 20 minutes of this and it's great.
i've set myself up an exercise routine to follow every morning and it's great.
at 10, i had an Abdominal and Internal Organ massage by a guy called Dr. Michael. He must be 70, looks good for his age, he is Chi Gong master too.
he started by teaching me all about my internal organs, the heart, lungs etc... and their places and spaces they take, explaining for organs to work correctly they need to have their space and freedom to move and do their job. lack of exercise, stretching, bad eating, stress, negative emotions etc all take their toll on our internal organs. our engine is in our chest and our belly, you get the picture....
he slowly massages your abdomen and loosens everything up. my stomach was so stiff, lots of knots and also dead waste in my colon. also my breathing was not 100% correct, too much with my lower abdomen and not enough with my chest. anyway, 1 hour later i feel a lot looser, but slightly bloated! my stomach is making odd noises. thing are working in there!
the massage followed by H-Wave. H-Wave is for pain control. they attached you to these frequency machine giving you electrical pulses, same as your body frequency to stimulate nerve activity and release pain. feels funny to begin with, kind of odd getting electrical shocks every 2 seconds, but then you relax into it and it really helps. i had 30 minutes of that, and i'm having it everyday for the next 2 weeks. hopefully in the next few days i will come off my painkillers, so no more pharmaceutical for me after that.
then at 1 pm i had a clonic. i always laughed at clonic, you know the thought of your private part being invaded and also a slightly gay sort of connection. how silly of me. Clonic is so important. imagine if you never cleaned your bin, what would happen to it? Clonic goes back a long way and it used to be one of the first point of call for most illnesses. it's a must for everyone, at least once a year if not more often.
anyway, the idea was to have the abdominal massage in the morning to loosen everything and then a clonic to wash everything out. Oh boy, the lady said the stuff coming out could have been there for years. i'm thinking more of the chemo days, regardless, i can not tell you how relieved i am. first the feeling, then the thought of all the toxic waste out of my body. this is truly a heavenly experience. i now know that my digestive system is clean. it's like when you clean the bin in the kitchen. i highly recommend it, specially if you are going to change your diet.
i had my lunch after and felt so good.
we had a lecture on Quantum Healing, have a look on the internet. this is the power of visualization of well being, the mind over body/matter. great stuff and i believe in it. i feel it first hand. as far as i am concerned i'm healed.
i went to the pool for an hour. i try to walk in the pool. it's a great exercise. but even in the pool i fall over and i have to find my balance. i tried to swim, but it was a bit too much. overall good exercise.
then at 5 i had a full body scrub, body cleanse and deep bath soak. totally pulling out all toxic, left over chemo and radio, and anything else stuck in my skin. after i could feel my body and skin breathing again, what a feeling : )
at 7 we had another lecture on Body Mind and Spirit. great lecture on the art of chinese medicine and acupuncture.
i am learning so much, feeling better and better everyday.
i'm so happy i'm here. i say it again, i saved my life. this place is truly magical.
i try and write again tomorrow, if not i look forward to reading your comments.
any interesting news or stories going on?
to life force and life itself
Sunday, 6 April 2008
Healthy Living
what i'm about to tell here is a very small, but an essential part of what they teach you.
everything we know about food is pretty much wrong. it's been the work of advertising, marketing and PR to sell us food. if you think about it, food is one of the biggest industries in the world. if you want to sell products, you tell people it's good for them, so everyone has a reason to tell you something.
here at Hippocrates, their ideology is going back to mother nature. the founder Anne Wigmore was told there was no cure for her cancer back in 1956. she went on green juice diet, wheatgrass and healed herself. she is 96 now and living in California. her story is much more inspirational than this, you have to get the book. what they tell us here is also based on 60 years of proof, 1000s of people who saved their own lives. the treatment is simple, one fits all. go back to the way mother nature created us and intended us to live and develop. the industrial revolution just happened too quickly, and for economic factors we have lost the way of life. it makes total sense, everything is geared towards mass production and fast living. it's money, money and money and people are abusing the truth and human trust.
Also we don't seem to worry about anything that doesn't kill us immediately. if it doesn't kill you in the next 24hrs or a year, it's ok. well, eating the way we do will not kill you. a bit of cheese, milk and meat, a few eggs here and there and some sweets. we all think we can handle it. but it's literally taking days, weeks or month off later in life. now let me tell you, we are all young and we don't think that far ahead. we will deal with it when it comes.
when you've been in my situation facing death, there is nothing more you want that to live. i promise you when you are 70 or 80, and if could live till 100, that would be another 20 years. imagine how much you would want to live? how any people do you know with illnesses at the age 50, 60, 70. everyone has something wrong with them, high blood pressure, back pains, weak joints, or more serious stuff. this is literally years of eating and living an unhealthy lifestyle that catches up with us. now some people are very fortunate and have the DNA or something and they live a long life. but reading the statistics these days, the number of illnesses out there is just crazy. 1 in 3 people have cancer before the age of 60! this never existed. people say it's because we live longer or we are more aware of it, but it's rubbish, it's the result of our fast lives. apparently children are the worst hit. the number of new diseases, kids with cancer or heart problems are increasing so fast. we never used to have children hospitals, now they are pooping up everywhere, it's a new business. the statistics speak for themselves.
So a few steps to healthy living, i've taken this from one of the handouts
throughout history, man seems to have lost his way, causing challenges and hardship for himself, his fellows and his world. when his happens, we are given opportunities to make adjustments in our lives in order to bring order back into balance. Ignorance of these opportunities results in the degenerative process that we call, "disease", which is merely an indication of our disregard for and flouting of the basic laws of life.
The most resent assault against the laws of life began with the advent of the industrial Revolution and accelerated at the end of the World War 2. During that time, we strip-mined the planet, thus depleting if of its resources via destructive agricultural and manufacturing processes. our misuse, overuse and abuse of the earth's resources have left it depleted of life-sustaining elements and created the accompanying need for medicine in the form of artificial fertilizers, pesticides, and purifying chemicals. until recently, the creation of invisible landfills for the dumping of toxic commercial and private sector waste has been virtually unrestricted, creating worldwide concentrated pockets of pollution that exacerbate the already distorted balance of health and nature on this planet.
the human race has also strip-mined its physical resources, depriving our bodies of enzimes, essential trace minerals, electrolytes and oxygen-supplies via the use of artificial (processed) foods. Chemical fertilizers ad pesticides have been subtly-imposed upon the human body via chemically sprayed inorganic vegetables, fruit and meat sources. Antibiotics, hormones and protein and fat content and promotes the formation of free radicals in the body. The Band-Aid solutions of magical pills, potions and potpourri created by the medical and pharmaceutical industries have upset our immune systems and created their own silent toxic dump-sites in our bodies while little healing.
consequently, the immune-systems (defense-systems) of humanity and all of life and their ecology are being impaired, impeded and exhausted. Life -- as we have come to know it, is being threatened. statistics indicate that, internationally, our health and quality of life are at an all time low. is there a way out?
Following are suggestions for strengthening the immune system by alterations in diet and lifestyle. Essential to this improvement are sun, oxygen, water, living food (enzymes, amino acids, essential fatty acids, trace minerals, electrolytes), exercise, rest, positive thinking and healthy environment.
Sun
- Spend 20-30 min in the sun. best time before 10 am and after 3pm. do not get burnt.
- protect sensitive areas
- Sun has all the essence of life, without it there is no life
Oxygen
- what is the first thing and last thing we do in life? we breath.
- breathing is so important. learn to breath deeply.
- purchase an air-purifier that creates oxygen for your home
- eat and juice plenty of sprouts
- use an oxygen-enhancer such as Genesis 1000 in your juices and drinking water
Water
- high quality distilled or reverse-osmosis water is best for drinking. this is pure water, what is used in labs.
- every other day, take a hot bath fr 20 minutes using saltes and baking soda, ground ginger or green clay (one or two cups per bath) followed by a cold shower rinse. this process pulls toxins specially heavy meals, out of the body through the skin. filtered water should be used for both bathing and showering.
Living Foods
- eat only organically grown produce
- your diet should consist of a minimum of 60% green sprouts and green vegetables and 15% of other rainbow-colored vegetables. it is best to eat them raw to maximize enzymes and oxygen.
- limit cooed foods to no more than 20%, by weight, of your diet. Best are steamed vegetables, backed winter squashes and sweet potato and lightly-cooked alkalizing grains (amaranth, buckwheat, millet, quinoa and teff)
- limit fruits to 5 to 15% of your diet (one to two pieces per day). select tree-ripened seasonal varieties. it is best to eat them when you awaken in the morning.
- eat and juice abundant baby green sprouts. sunflower and buckwheat are the most powerful. also good are alfalfa, arugula, cabbage, clover, cress, dill, fenugreek, garlic, kale, mustard, onion, pea, broccoli, radish etc. they a;; have essential healing and energy components.
- consume 2 green juices of sprouts, green vegetables and herbs daily. you can flavor them with the juice of ginger, garlic or anise.
- Drink and implant freshly squeezed wheatgrass-juice when available.
- use fresh water blue-green and green algae (blue-green, chlorella). Be sure that they are low-temperature processed. also consume sea-vegetables (alaria, arame, dulse, hijiki, kelp, kombu, wakame) on a daily basis. they supply important trace minerals, amino acids and electrolyte elements that are often absent from contemporary diets.
- soak and sprout all seed, grains and legumes before cooking or eating. nuts should only b soaked. this process activates enzymes, pre-digests complex nutritional structures (protein, fat and carbohydrates) and removes toxic substances fro the seed.
- for energy, consume sprouted grains or legumes raw is best, cooked is sometimes acceptable) during one meal per day. the best energy rich grains are the alkalizing ones: Amaranth, millet, quinoa and tell. secondary are buckwheat, kumit, rye, and spelt. the best legumes for energy are garbanzos and peas. among the best mineral-sources include mung-bean and adzuki sprouts.
- eat a handful of soaked almonds, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, sesame seeds or other nuts (except cashews or peanuts) 2-3 times per week during a meal when you so not consume grains or legumes. nuts and seeds are a good source of essential fatty acids and amino acids.
- use plenty of raw garlic in salads and fresh juices. garlic is a wonderful natural antiseptic.
- drink water sprinkled with cayenne pepper and take digestive enzymes 30 minutes before most meals in order to empty stomach and activate digestive function
- limit oils to cold press oils of flaxseed, olive, borage and grapeseed
- eliminate processed grain and dairy products, which are very acidic and mucous-forming; they also produce allergic reactions that cause stress in the immune-system
- eliminate all meat - including fish and chicken. all meat contains excess complex protein and toxic hormones, chemicals, and parasites that assault the immune system
- eliminate fried food, they decrease oxygen-availability, thereby creating an inviting environment for cancer cell development and viral growth
- avoid microwaved food. if you must reheat your food, dehydrating, steaming, baking, toasting and convection-oven heating are acceptable.
- eliminate foods that contain sugars (including dried fruit, honey, maple syrup, molasses, rice syrup, barley malt, and any food the name of which ends in "ose". the best substitute is stevia, a flower pollen extract.
- avoid food with added salt. Bragg Liquid Aminos is a good substitute.
- avoid alcohol, drug, food with vinegar, and soft drinks.
- learn and observe the laws of food combining. my god, this is a whole new chapter.
- eat only when you are calm and relaxed, and schedule meals during the daylight hours.
Exercise
- if a river doesn't flow, it will rot. if we don't exercise, the toxins don't come out
- stretch everyday, 10 minutes morning and night
- resistance exercise 30min 3 times a week
- aerobics 30min 3 times a week
- dry skin brushing, before shower or bathing. this is so good.
Rest
- 30 minutes after each meal
- don't drink or eat 3 hours before you go to sleep
- 8 hours uninterrupted per night
- fast on juice one day a week. drink only fresh juices, distilled water and herbal teas
- this gives your digestive system a good rest for the week
Positive Thinking
- be positive and take responsibility for your life circumstances.
- create health by envisioning it
Now all this reads well and sounds good, but it is hard to follow specially with the lifestyles we live. but if we can just do a little or as much as poss, it's already a step in the right direction.
as i said i will email the full booklet, it will teach you about sprouting etc. you can get so much on the internet these days.
with this blog we can start sharing internet sites and recommendation on where to buy good things. a water distiller is highly recommended, it costs around 200, but it's as essential as the juicer. the rest is a matter of habit and learning. we have to find the time and the right attitude to live a longer and better life. it is so simple and in the long run, much cheaper and enjoyable. i'm loving the food i'm eating. no more fatigue after a meal, i'm buzzing jumping around "on my crutches" : )
tomorrow is a hectic day, i have an abdominal massage (loosen up my digestive system and release all the toxics from the chemotherapy i had), 1 and half hours, follow by H wave (pain control), then a clonic and then full body scrub and clay detox (to remove radiation from radiotherapy). i'm spending most my time undoing the damage caused by the hospital!!!!! how ironic.
in between treatments there are very interesting lectures we go to. they teach us everything they tell us to do, so that mentally we are in tune with what we eat and how we behave. it's an excellent program. if the mind plays an 80% role in healing, understanding your dealing is key.
tomorrow i will make a list of books to read. there are some great books.
to life and life force
Thursday, 3 April 2008
Wed 3 April 08
today has been another good day. i started the day with some meditation, then a quick 35 minute infra red sauna session. had breakfast at 9 followed with a lecture on skin. The skin is our largest organ, it's what protects the body from most infections and also allow the body to breath and get rid of its toxins. i have never been one to pay too much attention to my skin. everyone has always told me i have a nice color skin, all year round tan, and i've just left it at that. the odd moistetariser here and there, but no where near as much as i should and could have done, or all my ex previous girlfriends used to do. a apparently a simple dry brushing everyday is enough to give you a very healthy skin.
i've booked myself in for a full body dry brush, scrub and deep clay soaking, this is to help get ride toxins, but also helps take out the radiation from the chemotherapy and radiotherapy. i've also booked myself in for 3 full body massages to help circulate the blood and stimulate by nervous system. hopefully help me recover from the numbness feeling i have from chest down.
i had more oxygen therapy, another 45 minutes followed by a hot jacuzzi and lunch. after lunch we had a fascinating lecture on supplements, herbal and homeopathic medicine. 95% of supplements on the market are actually dangerous for you. they are synthetic and the body recognizes them as viruses and attacks them rather than benefiting from them, Herbal and homeopathic medicine can be very good and effective, some work for some people and not others. you have to look into it, do your own research and find the right one for you.
according to Dr Clement, the institute director, we all need supplements as we just don't get enough of them through the food that we eat everyday, and that is living food, let alone when you cook your food. once you cook the food, there is pretty much nothing there, it's all burnt during the heating process. if you think about it, it makes complete sense. what other animal cooks its food before it eats it?
tomorrow i've having a nutrition deficiency test, it will take some 4 weeks for the results to come back, but it will give a full analysis of what is lacking in my body etc.
also tomorrow i will getting nutrition IV. this is where they will inject a cocktail of nutrition straight into my body. this is to help the immune system recover from the chemotherapy i've had over the last 8 months. it seems the biggest task these guys are facing in terms of healing me is to rectify the damage caused by western medicine first, only then can my body start to repair itself. there are so many people in the same situation as me here. different cancer, similar story. chemo, surgery, radiotherapy, wake up call, Hippocrates. there have been 1000s of people through the door over the years who have healed themselves. it's a great feeling when you hear this, it makes you smile and you look forward to life.
tomorrow i have my first ever psychotherapy session. I'm so looking forward to it. everyone always says why do nice people always cancer? you got all these rapists, murders and or just nasty people running round the world, why don't they get cancer or such illnesses?! well i'm beginning to think that part of the answer could very well be sitting here. emotional baggage can be a huge burden on the immune system. when we are sad or upset, we feel ill or we get a cold. When we are emotional, we feel run down etc and we tend to get ill. Now i never believed in too much of this stuff. i was always get up and go, put it in the back of your head and just deal with life. you can't get emotions get in the way of life, you have to deal with it and get on with it, or life will leave you behind. Well, maybe i should have stopped and done a bit spring cleaning, lighten the weight a little. i never thought there was ever anything in life that was bothering me. losing my mum and my sister at a young age didn't seem nice or a fair thing, but they were the facts of life and i had to deal with. Some people are born orphans, or face much more tragic family stories. I still have my dad and my bro, life is not bad at all. could be different but it is what it is. i'm looking forward to finding out where i've gone wrong dealing with these emotions or is there something else hidden away i'm not considering. i'm excited.
this is turning out to be a truly life changing experience. after facing death so closely, your doctor not being to look you in the eyes and simply giving you mathematical odds for your survival, coming here feels like being born again. imagine when you loose one of your favorite things, and you feel upset, then you suddenly find it and you feel so happy you got it back. Now imagine you loose life, and then you find it again, now imagine how that feels. this is what happens to you here, and it's happened to me.
i'm alive, i'm getting my life back
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